Sunday, July 27, 2008

moo.


today has been a hard newborn day. his awake time has been crying time, not the super-cute quiet alert time. i feel like all i do is feed him. when i try to cradle him in my arms and sing him lullabies he just turns with mouth agape to my nearest breast. sigh. am i just a feeding machine? doesn't he see my other maternal merits?

today i am full of fear and self doubt. am i selfless enough for this motherhood stuff? i have also had a chance to see my temper flare at the helpless newborn cry and that scares me. it's not really that i think i would DO anything in response to this anger, but the very fact that i felt it disappoints and scares me.

we will make it through this. but this parenthood stuff is hard.

3 comments:

Stephen said...

Ah Liz, there isn't a parent alive who hasn't lost their temper at an innocent baby and felt terrible.

Anonymous said...

Ditto. Sometimes it's just best to lay him in his crib, let him cry and take a few minutes to yourself.

Amy E. said...

Just here to say the same thing everyone else has. The combo of new tasks and demands and minimal sleep is hell on the nerves. Every single parent out there has lost at least once with their child (myself included). You're still a great mom.