what's up

Just felt like rambling, so here's a rambling post...

Sam is growing up faster and faster. In size he's relatively the same. Still big and round but not growing at the fast pace he had been. His feet are getting bigger though, which is good since he will have to stand and walk at some point. He now can move around the living room, holding on to the furniture, and when he gets to the end he raises his arm for me to come get him. It's cute. Tonight he also started trying to push up to his feet in the middle of the floor doing this tabletop sort of move, so that's funny. He has toppled over a couple of times, but nothing serious yet. He is always on the go. He walks on his tip-toes. I think maybe because he started walking in this walker where he could only touch the ground with his toes. Hopefully that won't make walking too hard for him.

I am so much more appreciative of my stay-at-home-mom status than I had been before my teaching job. Of course, I am more comfortable being a mom now so it's a little easier I guess. My days are very much housewife/mother stuff. I take care of Sam, I do laundry, dishes, sweep...There are more chores I should get to though and right now there are dishes and laundry that could be done... Sam and I have definitely found our rhythms and it's funny how much easier it is when you have a schedule. Of course, our schedule is easily disrupted if we don't get to nap time on time. If we don't start his nap on time, he probably won't nap, and then night sleep is thrown off and the next day is off and all of that. So even if we have a schedule I have to remain flexible. But I'm less complainy because I'm just happy to be able to do what I want to do -- be home with my son.

I still worry, of course. Oh, about everything I guess. Some thoughts currently in my head:

I don't know how to wean him. I don't know when to wean him. He is coming up on a year. I never thought I would nurse longer than that. But now I don't know. I suppose I will stop daytime nursing. Stopping nighttime nursing sounds hard though. I think most of my readers nursed beyond the year mark, right? Any thoughts? Of course I do resort to the boob as means of calming pretty quickly simply because I know it works...there may be plenty of other ways to lull the guy into a sleepy state and calm midnight wakes....

Birthday cake. Anybody have any good baby's first birthday cake recipes?? I'm not all that uptight about the guy having sugar, but I'm sure there's a healthier in-between and I know some of you are definite foodies...

And of course I still just don't know what to do in my professional life. The thing is, this whole mom thing is pretty all-encompassing. Right now, I don't feel a need to pursue a career to make my days meaningful or interesting. Really, paid employment feels just like that -- a means of getting paid. However, I don't want work to be just that. I want it to be more. And I absolutely hate that I'm still dealing with this at the cusp of 30. I don't think I have the drive and motivation (dare I say skill, talent, ability) to gain financially from my artwork, and that doesn't really bother me since I don't really care about my art right now. Really, right now I'm just pretty into being a mom. In the next couple of weeks I'm going to an info session about the nursing program at the local community college. I know it's not a great profession to pursue just because of practicality, but I figure a little more information can't hurt.

Oh, and I told myself that once I lost my pregnancy weight I wasn't allowed to think of myself as fat. But, I'm feeling extra blubbery these days. Pregnancy has definitely left me with a little extra in the love-handle/muffin-top region, and I do indeed have a tummy, though I always have. But really, I'm eating tons of sweets and since I'm home all the time I'm munching all the time, and I'm not getting enough exercise...if I get myself doing that stuff I'd probably feel better all around. In general, though, becoming a mom has done wonders for my body image. Even if my body is not all it could be, I am so much more forgiving of it. So that's cool.

Well, I guess I'll end here. Oh, here are some pics of more summer fun stuff...

Memorial Day Weekend

Not much to say, really! Things are going well. Sam has officially cut his third tooth. An upper incisor, but not one of the center ones -- the one to the right. Anyway, it has definitely made for some fussy moments and difficult sleep, but things aren't bad. Really, since I'm with him 24/7 the sleep is much more under control, though he does still have his rough moments. But generally, we have a schedule!! He wakes around 8:30, we have breakfast and play. Then around 10:30 he naps for two hours. Then around 3 or 4 he takes another nap for about an hour. Then he goes to bed around 9:30. His waking at night in general is not too bad, unless the teeth are really getting to him. Also, some days have been really hot and I think that makes for difficult sleep too. He wakes up with a sweat spot on the sheets!! Poor baby! He seems to just run hot. Some say teething brings a little fever so maybe that's happening too. I should note that we really don't even try to get him to sleep in his crib these days. It's co-sleeping/sleep sharing all the way. Think what you will, but right now it's the most successful arrangement we've found.

Aaron is working 35 hrs/wk and Sam and I play, sleep, eat, and clean during the day. I haven't gotten into too many of my projects, but I did start a blurb baby book for sam (www.blurb.com) which I can't help devoting too much of my time to. I have started working on text for the astro shirts, and I have also started plans for my new edition of Mumlors. But I haven't started making things.

Memorial Day weekend was nice though. Lots of family time for Aaron, Sam, and I. The weather was great, if a little hot, but we did get Sam a wading pool. Sam thinks water is so much fun!

Saturday

It's hot and humid already here in Indiana. Today we went to the park so Sam could play in the fountains. It was packed with kids, but Sam had fun playing in the water. He's transforming into a child before my very eyes. It's amazing.

New Sam facts:
He can pull himself to a stand now! And now he does it ALL the time. Whenever he can.
One of his top incisors has broken through, just a tiny bit, so we still have some more fussiness to come.

Question for you other moms out there:
So i know that when babies are teething they tend to bite when nursing. BUT do other babies think it's a joke?? Mine seems to take a fairly gentle bite and look up at me with an impish smile and when I say "no" or "ow" he does a little giggle. Is that weird???

Summer of Fun Has Begun

It seems summer has begun! Temps in the mid 80s, sunshine, and fun abound. I'm so thankful to have these days home with Sam. Sam has discovered the fun of the hose!! He thinks it's really neat. I have to watch out though, or he'll grab it and shove the end of it in his mouth. Yikes! The garden is doing well, we are already enjoying some lettuce and herbs and have blossoms on our tomatoes. I still have a few plants I need to get in the ground.

Not a lot of news. Aaron is working at the archives. He's not thrilled to be back at a 9-5 but it could definitely be worse. I'm still contemplating what to do with the career-portion of my life. My visit to see Sarah in Ann Arbor makes me want to move there. To do that I'd need a job. To get a job, what do I do? I'm back to thinking about nursing. I wish I wouldn't change my mind every other week.

Some pics of our summer fun:

Sam is very determined. He doesn't like the feeling of grass on his skin, but to get to the hose or that jug of water, he will crawl on hands and knees through the grass.

Discovering the joys of puddles and dirt.

Spring Fling is serious business.

Spring Fling!

What's in the veggie lunch, Stephanie??

Ann Arbor!

Dad & Sam outside Mike & Sarah's new house.

We went to Ann Arbor! It was a great trip! Long and short at the same time. Sam did pretty well in the car. On the way there, things were easy until the last hour or so, when he was exhausted but just couldn't sleep in the car. He finally started to doze about 10 minutes before we got to town. Then he was up and wild for the evening where we had a nice bbq (despite the rain) and got to see lots of family and friends. Thanks to everyone who came to see us and Sarah & Mike's new house!! After most of the guests left, I put Sam to sleep and he was out like a light. He slept pretty well that night too, despite air mattress deflation and other normal sleeping-in-someone-else's-house disturbances. Saturday was a fun family day, breakfast with some friends and then wandered around campus reminiscing. Went to dinner at Zingerman's Roadhouse where Sam wowed the table with his excellent table manners. That night sleep was much rougher. A little trouble getting to bed, but once I we got serious about it (dark room, I laid with him until he slept, he was out with ease). But he woke frequently and could not get comfy and could not sleep. Ended up on the couch, fairly upright, while we slept for very short intervals. He was up and at 'em before 7. Ugh. The start of the return drive he slept a bit, then was up and cranky, but he finally fell asleep and slept for more than two hours in the car. Phew! We did it! Traveling with a little one creates a whole different experience.

But again, it was a good time. Mike & Sarah's new house is great. I am so happy for them. There is a lot of space, it's really comfy, and the yard is beautiful. Congrats, guys! And thanks for having us!

AND right before we left home, Sam took his first hands & knees tummy-off-the-floor crawl!! Wow Sam! He really knows how to put on a good show for the family! Maybe they will come visit us sometime soon since now they know what they are missing, heh heh.

Mom and Dad.

Sam, Sarah, Mike, & Maggie playing in the living room.

Dad giving Sam a back massage with his toy plane.

The guys walking outside of the new art museum on campus.

Dad & Sam outside Tappan Hall -- Mom & Dad both had art history classes there.

The Law Quad.

Strollin'

Breakfast (Sam met Rachel!)

Sam and my cousin Alice...so that makes Alice Sam's what? First Cousin once removed?? I can't remember.

Sam & Grandpa

The guys trying to repair stuff.

Sam & Grandpa

Sam saying that he wants to play with my new camera.

New Camera!

I got one!! A Canon powershot elph sd790 is. I think I like it!