31 weeks

So this week I will be 31 weeks pregnant. Pretty cool. Nothing really to report on the baby front. My baby shower is on Saturday, sorry to all the out of towners that aren't able to make it. I hope you did appreciate your invites and didn't just take them as solicitation for gifts!! But judging by the gifts arriving I'm worried it came across as the latter ;-) I'm grateful though, and so is the little boy I'm sure, oh and the bigger boy too.

Saturday the art group I work with (the CAI) did our project for the IMA On Procession parade in downtown Indianapolis. We created the CAI SpaceTank and it was awesome. I got sunburnt though. And I walked for two+ miles and spent the morning building the thing. Wow, my pregnant body gets tired a lot faster than the previous body! Anyway, once that was done I felt a lot of relief and freedom. So good that this stuff is all coming to an end and I can focus on baby time!! Sunday we had a b-day bbq for our friends Esteban & Tain, and that was fun too, though the weather was cold. Aaron and I have been prepping the house and it's starting to feel less like art studio and more like home, so that's also good news. All in all it was a good weekend! And no more goose attacks!!

I am moving into the 8th month of pregnancy, I'm feeling pretty big, he's moving around in my belly all the time, and discomfort is increasing. I'm still feeling pretty darn good, but I do suffer regularly from heartburn, occasional knee pain, and it sure is hard to bend over!

fowl play

today was an eventful day.

first, i think i am developing "THE MASK OF PREGNANCY" which just sounds scary. actually, i don't even know if i have it. i get freckles in the summer and this year they look weird. like they are kind of clustered together tightly on my nose and cheek. hmmm. it's pretty subtle so far.

second, aaron and i went to see a movie tonight! it was fun. when we got to the theater there was a goose in the parking lot. we watched our movie, and when we left, the goose was still there! in the same spot! we walked along the sidewalk, keeping our distance, and it started to walk towards us. we thought it wanted some candy. then all of a sudden it started to charge us. aaron yelled "run!!" and i yelled back "i can't!!" and then i turned around and the goose had flown over aaron and was running towards me!! i started to run and it took flight towards my head. i covered my head and ducked (heh heh) and the goose flew past me, first hitting my arms with his wing or something. eek. then we got away. looks like another goose was sitting in this walled off planting bed near the theater, so this goose must have been protecting a nest?? aaron felt as though he should have done something else to protect his nest, ha ha, but there wasn't much to be done. anyway, we luckily escaped unharmed. it was pretty wacky. didn't get any pics, so you can enjoy this youtube video and imagine aaron and i in a parking lot being attacked by these geese...

Doc Update, Week 30

Well, I'm not 30 weeks yet, but we had our doctor's appointment so I thought I'd check in. Once again, all is well and normal! Heartbeat is 143, I'm measuring right on track so there just isn't much to report -- I guess that's a good thing!

Only physical change is that I have been experiencing what I would call morning sickness during this past week, so that's a bummer. It is not like the "real" morning sickness I experienced during the first trimester. This time it's really just in the morning -- I have like three hours of nausea and uneasiness, and then it fades away. I asked the doc about it and she said it may actually be related to acid reflux. Even if I don't have the heartburn/chest pain feeling, taking some Zantac before I go to bed might help. So I might give that a try. I have temporarily switched my schedule to work in the afternoons instead of the morning, since I've been feeling fine then. Ooh, I do get hot quite often now, and the weather is just starting to warm up too, so that makes it a bit worse. And I am starting to experience a little swelling in my hands -- nothing to cause concern yet though.

I guess that's all!

29 wks (almost)

Ok, I'm jumping the gun on this one. I won't be 29 weeks until TOMORROW but I thought I hadn't posted some belly pics in a while, and since I'm complaining a lot about how big I'm getting I might as well share some images that might be closer to reality than my complaints are!

Thanks for the support from you guys via emails and comments. It means a lot, even though you'll probably hear me voicing the same ol' concerns over and over.

Also, baby shower news: We're planning a Lafayette shower Saturday May 3rd. Time and location TBD. If you can come, that's awesome!! Thanks to Ingrid & Meg for putting this together.

Here are the pics!!

concerns

As I sit here, less than three months away, a number of concerns, big and small, still float around my head.

1) How big am I gonna get??? I have been obsessed with my belly size from the very beginning. There are all these websites on pregnancy where you can view pictures of other pregnant bellies, constantly seeing how you compare, week by week. I assume some concern over your changing body is pretty darn normal, but sometimes I'm pretty sure I'm a little too worried about it. It's just that I have never had a very healthy body image, so the idea of weight piling on (even if it's for such an amazing reason) really freaks me out. So now here I am, 7 months along, with an unmistakable for-real baby belly. Strangers are comfortable commenting on it, and now people even like to touch it (only friends so far, so that's ok with me!). I should acknowledge that I am indeed partly proud, because I feel this overwhelming pride for the little guy inside, but I'm also really self conscious. And I still have nearly three months to go. How many more pounds will I gain? How many more inches will my stomach and (gulp) thighs expand? Will the clothes that I can wear now see me through these next few months? Will my belly button pop? Will I get stretch marks? Have my stomach muscles separated in the dreaded diastasis? What will my body be after all of this is over? I have never been a bikini-wearing body-proud gal, but will I be even more self-conscious and unhappy with my body once I get through this? I feel so selfish having these thoughts, as though I should find beauty in my body as host for the amazing little being inside, but I don't know how to shed 27 years of societal training in understanding physical beauty.

2) Diapers. We have been intending to go cloth. I have found these new highly recommended yet EXPENSIVE all-in-ones that fit like disposables and are one-size so they work for the tiny and bigger guys (bumgenius). They are $18/each which seems a little over-the-top, though, and I'm afraid that when the reality of baby hits, we will end up going with disposables anyway. The waste of disposables really disturbs my husband and me, but the waste in water and energy disturbs us with cloth diapers. The answer is really not so black and white.

3) Breast pumps. So it is likely that I will need to return to work not all tooooo long after the baby is born (three or four months). The medical world recommends breast feeding for the first 12 months. This means I will want/need to get into regular pumping. I also like this idea because i think it would be great for my husband to get to share in the feeding of our new son. I bought a hand pump on sale fairly early on, and initially thought that would do it. But now I'm second-guessing. If I am feeding my baby regularly with expressed milk, is it worth it to get those wacky electric pumps? Some women swear by them, others swear they feel like a cow. Many women seem to say they are completely worth the big $$, but are they? What if I don't use it? And what bottles and nipples to get? Do you try a few and see what works? Or just go with the ones that get the best reviews?

4) Can I provide??? Perhaps the thing that brings me to tears most often during my hormonal tidal waves is the fear of not being able to provide. Often this is centered on financial concerns, but really it extends to every possible thing. I end up spending all this time thinking about my feelings as a child, my worries, my concerns. How can I make sure he has what he needs and even some of what he wants? How can I make sure he's happy? Do I have the resources to do this? Are we too young? Did we jump into this? What if I just can't go back to work after meeting our little guy. How will we pay the bills? Will we always drive this old 1990 Corolla? Will we ever find a place we actually want and can settle down in for a while?

5) Daycare. This is a huge worry. Tied to the previous concern of being able to provide: What if we can't afford to live on one income? Day care scares the h*ll outta me. How can I ship my new little guy off to someone else for the majority of the day during his most formative years? This is something I really want to avoid. But can we, with our middle class educations and working class incomes, afford to have a stay-at-home parent? A completely disturbing thought. And I think this is one issue we will just have to wait on ...


There are undoubtedly many more concerns, but my morning is quickly disappearing as I ramble in this blog and chat online. And taxes call.

clyde obama

So we are 28 weeks! Less than 90 days to go. Pretty cool. He's been moving around a lot today, so that's fun. It helps keep me entertained at work.

Today I even got to play the pregnancy card! Yesterday I found out that Barack Obama was coming to Lafayette, so I waited in line for an hour to get tickets. Aaron and I got to see him speak in a "town hall" type presentation at a local high school gym. It was really cool. There were about 3000 people there, and we didn't get there until about 45 minutes or so before it was supposed to begin. When we got there it was standing room only, but I said "I'm a pregnant lady. Can I get a chair?" So the nice girl let us get special seating with the old folks right behind Barack. It was pretty sweet. The speech was good, but the gym made it hard to understand some of it, with echoing voices and cheers from the crowd. Barack seemed a little tired but still remained a captivating speaker. I plan to post some pics and/or video clips (it's hard to understand the audio though and the images are not that great) but they are still downloading from my camera.













In other news, yesterday Clyde went to get his teeth cleaned. We adopted him when he was about 2, and he always had disgusting breath and brown teeth. The vet never said anything about it, but the past couple of weeks Clyde was hesitant to eat his crunchy dog food, and would rub his gums after eating. Poor pup. So we took him to the vet for a cleaning. The tartar came off pretty easily and he only had to lose one tooth, but that's still a lot for a dog his age (about 5). We got some tooth stuff for him and hopefully that will prevent further build up. His breath is great now though, and though he was groggy and grumpy yesterday, today he seems to be back to his perky pacing little self. Yay for Clyde!!

i passed!

i passed my glucose test!

that is all...

27 1/2 weeks...

I'm back in Lafayette! I made it to Big Rapids for the wedding, which was nice, but I was a big grump the whole time (sorry Nemec family) because I was tired and didn't really feel like going in the first place. The wedding was for Aaron's good friend Paul, and though I've known him for many years, he and I aren't really friends. Aaron was in the wedding party, so I didn't really spend any time with him, and I didn't really know people at the wedding either. Plus I was just really worn out. All of this led to grumpy Liz, which Aaron and his parents had to put up with. Hopefully I wasn't too hard to be around! So I did get to see Aaron's parents (his dad was marrying the couple), his sister, and grandma, so that was nice. We don't get to see them too much because they all live in different places, so it's great that we had this opportunity to get together, even if it was a bit hectic.

I'm very sleepy and hope to get a nap in before heading to work this afternoon. I haven't been to work for a week, so that feels a little strange and I dread the catch-up. However, the promise of future employment with the archives is continuing strong, and I think I'll be talking with the head archivist about it this week, so that's cool. I will of course keep you informed.

As for the little one in my belly: He gets bigger every day, as I am too. I went to the doctor today, and I seem to continue to gain about 5 lbs per month, though the recommendation is to gain 4 lbs. Ah well. My doctor says my weight gain is entirely normal and healthy so I will try not to worry about the extra pounds too much. I'm hoping that now that school is done I will be able to get a little more exercise and make some smarter choices in my diet. We'll see! Today at the doctor I also had to drink the nasty glucose drink (like a syrup of orange crush) and they drew my blood. I'll let you know if anything comes back abnormal. The little boy moved around in response to the sugar, though, and it's always funny to watch him move from one side of my belly to the next. I also asked my doctor about when I could comfortably consider returning to work and she said 6 weeks post-partum (6 weeks!!). I think I'll definitely try for more than that. And we asked about circumcision too, as we have been discussing this with family and reading a lot about it lately. I just wanted to know if my doctor (who I trust so far) really had any medical knowledge that would recommend circumcision. Her response was that the decision is cultural and not medical, and that so far there really was no medical evidence to prove that circumcision would be beneficial to our boy. Good to know.

Other baby news: Thanks to the Remsbergs & Nemecs for the big bags of hand-me-down baby clothes! Looks like the little one won't have to go naked after all!!

Visits

I could just keep titling these posts "I'm done" over and over, because I just keep plugging along from one big step to the next. But last night I was able to get my show down (with the help of Sarah, Dad, Juan, Stephanie, and Nick) so that was the next big step. Now I just have the silly details of binding my paper and turning in my portfolio. Will take some time, but not a big deal, and they aren't due until the end of the semester.

Today I head up to Big Rapids, Michigan, with Sarah and Dad. I have to be at Aaron's friend's wedding at 4:30. Aaron is already there, as he is in the wedding party and needed to get there yesterday for the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner. I had a nice long sleep (though I tossed and turned a lot without Aaron and the dogs around) but somehow I still think this wedding might wear me out. We'll see. It's been a long week, and Aaron, my crutch, will have to be in the wedding and sitting at the head table and all of that, leaving poor little pregnant Liz all by herself. Yeah, ok, maybe I get a little dramatic over these things. But I don't really like weddings that much, unless maybe I'm a little closer to the bride and groom or I get to enjoy the wine. Hey -- I'm not a big drinker, don't get me wrong -- but wine and champagne definitely make an awkward wedding a little more fun. And my sore feet and big belly will probably keep me off the dance floor, ha ha (another thing I don't partake of very often, but with weddings, cheesy 80s music, and wine, you might see me out there after all).

Anyway, I will make it through the wedding, then Sunday Aaron and I will meet up with his parents, sister, and grandma for a meal. His parents are living in Wyoming these days, but his dad is a Lutheran pastor and is performing the wedding service today (wedding is for old family friends) and so they have traveled to the Midwest. Aaron's grandma lives in Cleveland, so his parents flew to Cleveland, got grandma, drove to Grand Rapids to meet up with Aaron's sister -- it's sort of an impromptu family reunion. It will be really nice to see them, since we don't get to see each other very often, and they are probably curious to see the growing belly.

The little one is doing well I think. I haven't been able to feel him quite as often the past couple of days -- I sure don't feel him as much when I'm all preoccupied and overwhelmed with stuff. But he and I should probably get some good lazy couch time this week and I'll probably feel him saying hello a lot more. His movements are bigger these days though, and Sarah did get to feel a little push during her visit.

Before I sign off this long post, I should say it was very meaningful to me that my sisters and dad were able to come down to see my show. It's sort of like my graduation, and though I am not too into those things either, it meant a lot to see their support as I complete this three-year chapter in my life. Plus I get pretty sentimental as of late. So thanks to you guys!! (And Tom sent some Zingermans goodies as congratulations, so that was pretty fun too!) The visit has been pretty quiet: eating, playing games, and talking babies. I think I freaked Sarah out by all my diaper, breastfeeding, and circumcision talk!

So here are a couple of pictures from the visit. I meant to take more but didn't. Sarah and Dad did though, so maybe I'll get a few of those later...

FINISHED.

Just a quick post to say my talk was fine and the reception was fun and I think this means I'm done!! Tomorrow my dad and sisters are coming down to see the show, and other than their visit I have no obligations so we get to actually hang out and I will be virtually stress-free! I'm really looking forward to the visit. I still don't know how I'll entertain them, but it means a lot that they are coming down. Plus they can see that I am actually pregnant, so that's a bonus too.

Friday is another crazy day. Meg leaves for Las Vegas, so I am taking her to the shuttle (to the airport) at like 4:30 in the morning. Then Aaron leaves town because he's in his friend's wedding back up in BR. Then Saturday I head up to BR with my dad and Sarah because I guess I should go to this wedding too. The fun never ends!! I'm looking forward to next week when things will really slow down. I have my doctor's appointment on Monday, and that's when I'll do the glucose test to check for gestational diabetes (something I'm really paranoid about, I guess because I'm such a sugar addict), and I will be working full time at the library to make up my lost hours this week. So it isn't exactly as though I'm on vacation, but it ain't bad either.

Today marks 27 weeks!! Third trimester here we come!!

I did it!!

The defense went well! They were all really congratulatory the whole way through. I have officially earned my Master of Fine Arts degree. Sweet. As my friend Ingrid & I joke, I am now a master of my own work (since in art you basically just talk about yourself the whole time anyway).



It's a big relief. Tomorrow at noon I give my lecture, and then 6:00 is the reception. I will keep you posted with how everything goes!

two hours to go

eeek! so i have nothing to say. nothing. i just am all nervous for my defense which is taking place in less than two hours. all the silly things run through my head...am i dressed appropriately? will i be able to close off the gallery so others don't come in and interrupt the defense? do i need to bring a notebook and pen? my prof sort of indicated that it would just be a few questions and be about 30-60 minutes and that i didn't need to prepare. but really, shouldn't i have prepped SOMETHING? i have one of my drafts of the paper with some Qs from one of the profs on it, so i'm going through those. i guess it can't be too bad. i know he's going to sign my form and i will officially be DONE after this meeting, but it is still scary to think of this awkward 30-60 minutes. but that's not long. H*ll. i'll be going through many hours of awkward and painful birth in the upcoming months, i can deal with some silly art professors.

poor baby hasn't had much attention on this blog. i have been a little pre-occupied. i can tell you yesterday though that some of his movements showed me how big he is getting (of course my belly shows me that daily too). there were some movements yesterday that really indicated that there was another being inside me, one that has his own mind and does his own things. some of the earlier movements were definitely involuntary body movements, but i could still feel somehow attached to them, as if it was part of me. these movements began to express his individuality, ha ha.

keep checking my flickr if you want to see more pics of the show.