internet, my friend and foe

so today he has not been so easy. lots of crying with mom and dad trying to guess what's going on. diaper? food? bored? hot? cold? since his feeding and diapers have proved to be normal and healthy over the past number of days, i am easing up on my baby log and scheduled feedings and am sticking with feeding on demand, as all my reading seems to indicate this is the way to go. today he has desired feeding very very often, and sometimes just wants to nurse for comfort. he just can't seem to get comfy and sleepy today. he is 11 days old today, and i did read that babies go through a growth spurt around 10 days and they will demand more food. maybe that's simply what's going on. he sure does feel bigger already! other possibilities: we moved the air conditioner to the living room, so it's cooler throughout the house and he's happier sleeping swaddled in a blanket; i am running out of my prescription pain meds so i'm cutting back -- maybe they were drugging him up and keeping him a happy little sedated baby?? which leads me to my main topic for today...

so the internet has been my companion throughout this pregnancy, as you can tell from this blog. i have enjoyed sharing my experiences and worries at each stage of the game. and even more than that, i have enjoyed being able to have easy access to other women's experiences, birth stories, etc., so i can try to gauge whether what i'm going through or feeling is NORMAL. usually, throughout the pregnancy, it was a great comfort to find after a quick google search or two that whatever weird pregnancy thing turned up, i was, indeed, perfectly normal. however, now that the little one has entered the free world, i am no longer so worried about me. i worry about him. and what a whole new world of worry this is!! each day he changes. there is a new skin thing, a new facial expression, a new sound, a new movement. so now i spend even MORE time googling weird baby stuff. sometimes this can calm my nerves to read some list of normal baby behavior, but if i can't find specifically what i'm looking for, or if i somehow take a wrong turn, i can quickly spiral into more and more anxiety. makes me wonder if i'd be happier without my constant companion the internet.

current things i'm googling:

• still reading about burping. your comments have been extremely helpful but i still wonder if i'm doing it right...sigh. it will come.
• sam has started making the cutest little cooing noises when he nurses sometimes. i just wanted to read more on what that's about. no luck really.
• coughing. sometimes it sounds like sam is trying to clear his throat. i'm worried about the whole burping thing, so with the coughing i start to think maybe he's choking on milk or something like that.
  
• hiccups. ok, i've read over and over that hiccups are normal and don't bother the infant, but it seems like they bother him to me! and again, i can't help but think it's my fault because of excess air bubbles that i'm not burping out that cause the diaphragm to spasm.
  
• breathing patterns. sometimes sam does this panting sort of breathing and it freaks me out.
  
• darvocet. it is deemed safe for breastfeeding and is the pain medicine i was prescribed. it is a level 2 though, meaning it is ok according to the limited studies that have been done, or if there were complications they were "remote". i do currently wonder whether it passed through to my little guy and has made him extra sleepy. hmmm. so i've been trying to google about that.
  

anyway, there is probably a ton of other stuff, but i really can't help wondering if i would accept all the little funky baby things as normal and healthy if i didn't have this readily available source to help me question. hmmm.

comforting list i just found:
Some newborn behaviors that concern parents are not signs of illness. They are usually due to an immature nervous system and will disappear in 3 or 4 months. Some common reflexes and behaviors include:

• trembling chin
• quivering lower lip
• having hiccups
• passing gas (this is not a temporary behavior)
• making noises when sleeping (from breathing and moving). Also during light sleep, babies can normally whimper, cry, groan, or make other strange noises. If you use a nursery monitor don't over-react to these normal variations in sleep sounds.
• sneezing
• yawning
• spitting up or burping
• stiffening of the body after a noise or sudden movement (also called the startle reflex)
• straining with bowel movements
• clearing the throat (or gurgling sounds in the throat)
• breathing irregularly (This is normal if your baby is content, the rate is less than 60 breaths per minute, any pauses are less than 10 seconds long, and your baby isn't turning blue. Sometimes babies take rapid, progressively deeper breaths to completely expand their lungs.)
• trembling or jitteriness of arms and legs during crying is normal. Convulsions are rare. During convulsions babies also jerk, blink their eyes, rhythmically suck with their mouths, and don't cry. If your baby is trembling and not crying, it could be abnormal. Give her something to suck on. If the trembling doesn't stop when your baby is sucking, call your health care provider immediately.

Ah, welcome to parenthood...

sam yawns: