Monday, March 24, 2008

etiquette

So my sister and friend are going to throw me a baby shower! Or throw the little one a baby shower. Well, however you look at it it's super sweet and I'm not sure anyone has ever thrown me a party before so I'm very honored. But as I begin to think about a guest list, I realize I am not sure how etiquette works on this!! SO if you read this, please voice your opinion in comments, because I need advice...

Here's the deal:
At this point the plan is to do the shower here in Indiana. This is great for Aaron, my Indiana friends, and me, but not ideal for my out-of-state friends and family. Aaron and I have a number of close relatives and friends that we would love to have celebrate with us during such an event, yet in all probability they will not be able to attend. What do you think? Is it more rude TO invite or NOT to invite? Does an invitation feel like we're just looking for gifts? Does lack of invite come across as a slight?

I'm not so good at this social stuff!!

6 comments:

Rachel said...

You could create special invitations for out-of-state friends and family that say there's a celebration and we wish you were here, but it's not logistically possible. Then maybe you could talk about when you think you might see said people (holidays, etc.) and say "so we'll have a chance to celebrate then." I don't know. I haven't had a drop of coffee yet, but that seems to convey that spending time with them means more than just "gimme gimme gimme!"

Liz said...

that sounds like a good solution. thanks rachel!

Stephanie said...

Do what feels right to you, first of all. :) But I don't think there's anything wrong with inviting people you are pretty sure can't come -- people that you are close with and that you want to come. They'll be happy for the invitation, and you may be surprised who is willing and able to travel for a special occassion like this. Plus, then those that do want to buy you a gift will know what you need (even though I know that's not what it's about!) :) That's way different than inviting a bunch of random third-removed relatives just to get gifts. hee hee

Anonymous said...

I'm not going to be there, sorry Liz, but I expect an invitation. Ask me about any in-laws if you are not sure. Rachel's suggestion is good but some people you won't see at celebrations either. And some one will surprise you and come because it's a good reason to see you again. And they want to see what you look like pregnant. :-)

Anonymous said...

I think sending invitations to those of us who can't come is wonderful because then we feel included in this happy occasion. I'm looking forward to knowing when and where. This is a happy time for everyone and a shower isn't a "gimme" event. It is a time for your friends and family to share your joy.
If you and Aaron are going to Michigan, it would be terrific if there could be a shower there, especially for the family and friends in Michigan who aren't able to come to Indiana.
hugs sally

Liz said...

Thanks to all of you!! I think I will just go ahead and send invites -- I trust you guys, especially since you are all friends and relatives from afar :) Anyway, all invites will indeed be sincere invitations, so I guess that's what counts.